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October 07, 2015

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Don't Count Your Eggs

It's all really painful JCS. And connecting is hard and you have to connect only where you get real support. Sometimes it's hard to find. Tennis and other activities are a great idea. I did yoga. It saved me in so many ways. Sending love.

Don't Count Your Eggs

Oh Blake. I'm so sorry. It's awful to just be...stranded. I hope a new path opens for you and some pieces of this puzzle start to fit together. We're all rooting for ya

JCS

Great post! It is so hard to stay connected when going through IVF. I have withdrawn from friends who are pregnant or have newborns- it's just too painful. But I have tried to stay connected in other ways, I recently joined a tennis club and my husband and I ramped up our search for a home to buy. These activities have connected me to the community and others who are far removed from my infertility struggle. It makes me feel normal again. The chronic worry, the clock ticking, the panic and anxiety seem to disappear and it's such a relief!

Maryann

I agree with Jojo. The infertility journey caused me to withdraw from closest friends and family because I felt completely misunderstood and some comments from well wished parties were very hurtful. Now when we are pregnant with donated embryo I just stay isolated as the less I say the less there is possibility of being hurt. It sucks to hold all those emotions inside and not be able to share but I guess it is the reality.

Jojo

Oh no Blake- I am so sorry to hear this. I have followed a few of your other comments on here and have wondered how you are. I am sending you a big virtual hug. I hope this phase of being stuck but still feeling pain is short lived. Maya- you are so right about staying connected. Something I never did and only contributed to the isolation. My only word of caution is to be careful who you tell. Support groups and online friends are great but I have found that some real life friends end up causing you pain (not on purpose) once they know by constantly asking for updates or changing how they treat you. Just my experience. Xo

Blake

I'm finding myself in a strange place lately. We were told not to continue with IVF because the odds are not in our favor, at all, and we've decided to hold off on any other options at this time. But yet, I'm still wanting to be a mom. I'm over the giant waves of sadness that would come over me, but seeing friends carry on their traditions with their kids, like first day of school, friday night movie nights, all holidays, yada yada, it does get to me a little bit. I just think with every holiday that passes, instead of feeling closer to my own, I feel farther away from it all. Like it won't ever be me.

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