I heart retrospect

One day, either this will all make sense, or we'll be able to look back and say, "remember when..." Retrospect is a beautiful thing in that regard. It creates our past and allows for a different perspective in our present. That's the beauty of life and time. It keeps moving forward. And with this forward movement we are left with no choice but to learn how to cope with uncomfortable feelings. How to sit with or lean into the crappy parts and how to fully enjoy the good times. 

Over the past few years I've been learning to just be with whatever situation or feeling is present. It's a difficult thing to do, because when you feel like you're up Shits Creek without a paddle, all you want to do is swim out of there. Find an escape, flag down a rescue boat, drink enough of whatever to help you feel numb to the fact that your floating along these nasty waters. If you start to sink, yes, muscle your way out. GET OUT however you can. But if you happen to just be sitting there looking out onto a sea of confused nothingness, learning to just be with it and be okay with all the feelings that come with being at this place may help you eventually find clarity. The more I can accept our path and what has happened and how I feel, the better I am at coming to terms and then calmly and creatively thinking about a solution. Can I build a paddle out of a tree branch? Can I signal the Loch Ness monster to swim by and carry me to shore so I can look back at our little rubber dinghy and think, "huh, I'm glad I'm not there any more." 

I think we have to allow a little time and space for our feelings to simmer, and I think it's important to really sit with them. Invite the feelings, however painful, to take their course so we can process them and then let some of it go. Then we can wipe our eyes, uncurl our fists, and approach the next step with courage and clarity. It's not easy, but it's doable. Maybe not today, perhaps tomorrow.

Wishing much love to all those out there floating on their own rubber dinghy. May we find the strength to be present with our hurt so we can eventually  find a way to shore.

Comments

[Lauren]

Sweet lady,

I have just read your posts from this sad, terrible week. I can't imagine the shock and disappointment.

I just want to tell you that I think you are doing a beautiful job of processing your awful news.

Sending you both so much love and strength to get you to the next part of your journey.

Lauren xo