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February 06, 2014

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Davy S

I am glad to learn that other couples stay focused on being a team. I am very open to adoption, so I'm not sure how far I want to go in the testing/treatment process. Since most of the tests and procedures are done on me, we have an agreement: if the doctors recommend a procedure for me that my husband wouldn't be willing to endure, I will not have it done. We plan to go to each appointment together and come to a consensus on every recommendation.

Don't Count Your Eggs

I'm so glad to hear that the opposite of this article can also be true. That IF can make a couple closer and stronger and that it helps us all appreciate our significant others in a deeper way than we ever imagined. Courtney, I'm sorry for your bad news. It is NOT your fault, your Hubs is right. Glad he always has your back.

Cheryl

Great post!! Struggling with infertility forces couples to examine priorities in life and come to an agreement about complex and life changing decisions . It's certainly not for the faint of heart. Changing personalities and perspectives along the way is another huge hurdle. I know women who have the stance "I will have a child no matter what" but unfortunately that can mean without their spouse on board. My husband will always be my priority and I his. I'm not saying that works for everyone, but it has been our grounding point. And when I start to feel the envy creeping when around my friends with kids, I remind myself that I have something enviable in my life too. Infertility has tried and tested our marriage in every way. I know we'll make it, no matter what. That isn't something a lot of couples definitively know. Best of luck to everyone out there!!

Courtney

Great post! We just got news two days ago that our FET had failed. It's very easy for me to have those thoughts of guilt/shame (like this is all my fault) but my husband reminds me that he has my back and we are in together always. Hope you have a great weekend!

Blake

My hubby and I have been together since high school, this year will be our 10 year anniversary, and I will say too, that obviously, our marriage has had its share of arguments, but at the end of the day, even the hardest of days, we are best friends. The very best of friends. I would venture to guess that those that went through fertility issues (or any other issue) were not at the very core of their relationship best of friends. I recently said on FB that marriage is like one long slumber party. Minus the frozen bra. He wouldn't dare do that to me. :)

Remagineit

Great article! I consider myself lucky that my wife and I are closer than ever after going through some major life experiences. All relationships require work but it takes even more work when experiencing things like IF because it affects everything: work, social, finance, mental health, physical health, etc...

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